Summer Only Happens in the Summer
(1999)

Summer only happens in the Summer
the album the songs

The Album

Life had to get better - it did - proof is in this cosy collection of summery surf's up ditties.

Now some folk would say that "She couldn't make the stretchmarks tan" is sexist. Well, cast your mind back to the 80's - was "Nice legs, shame about the boat race" sexist? Anyway, it's simply a matter of observation. Now the songwriter happened to be strutting round the pool on some kind of Aegean holiday and noticed that, notwithstanding the chicness, svelteness and general all round well-maintainedness of the assembled company of swarthy Mediterranean mothers, those critical strands of what one might term "scar tissue" were simply devoid of the requisite level of pigmentation which would have ensured a seamless whole. (What the hell are you on about? - Ed). Didn't the Red Hot Chilli Peppers also write about scar tissue?

Bjorn Borg, on the other hand is an arrangement of Neil's mate Steve Smith's account of the said tennis player winning his fifth Wimbledon in a row, deftly equating that feat to success (or otherwise) in male-female relationships - you figure it out!

Never heard of Steve Smith? No, not the poet - the rodent-like guitar player who, together with Neil, his brother Rod and Boris the bass player, a long time ago in a far off land, played in the proverbial "we're all going to be famous" rock band (see pic). This band produced not only Bjorn Borg but also "She's Washing her Hair Tonight" and "Karen and Gary" both of which appear on "Return to Malibu".

Steve later achieved lasting fame in the electronic taxi meter design industry.

Note the artwork - take one Barbie doll, a cardboard guitar which you made when you were a kid and your old Action Man (or in this case Taiwanese pirate equivalent) - scatter some builders sand around and wait for it to snow - well it snowed, but the photo shoot was left to the next day and the whole sodding lot had melted bar some scruffy end bits at the bottom of the garden - so those nice computer people had to come to the rescue!

We also nearly used the trumpet-playing lunatic, Chris (somebody) on the title track, but he could barely walk, having od'd on nutmeg (there's one in every town…).